Sunday, May 31, 2009


My friend Dorothea died in her sleep two nights ago.

On the one hand, I'm very glad I got the chance to see her when I was home on leave. But on the other hand, I'm feeling bereft right now.

I was not able to say good-bye properly to her (i.e., in person) as I'd have liked to have done. We last spoke about two weeks ago; she was very weak, so our conversation was very brief. I didn't want to call after that, afraid I'd disturb her when she was resting, but knowing there was no way for her to call me, should she want and be able to talk.

Moreover, I won't be able to be there to give her an appropriate send-off.

Long deployments are tough on interpersonal relationships.

Multiple long deployments over a short period of time -- as so many of my friends here Down Range have endured -- are particularly rough in that regard.

My condolences to Mike and to Kathryn.

Blessings and peace to one and all,

Fr. Tim, SJ

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1 comment:

Mary Coady said...

Thanks for your posting about Dorothea.

Like you, I feel terribly sad about not saying goodbye. It's been very hard to not be able even to say hello over the past months, but saddest of all to not say goodbye and to thank her for her wonderful friendship. Jim O'Brien wrote me a month or so ago that "all we can do now is pray," and I've been praying for Dorothea, and for Kathryn and Mike.

It's been a year of difficult losses. As when my aunt/godmother died, Dorothea's death makes me feel that another sun has burned out of the universe. And then I'm reminded of what Fr. Chris Corbally would say--and that is, that we are truly stardust, made of the very same elements, and my hope is that Dorothea, Aunt Anne and all the loved ones we've lost are now stars. With luck they're in our galaxy, shining their brightness, light and beauty on those of us here.


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